Waddism isn't a religion, though I suppose because it is universal it is a sort of religion. It is the belief in fallibility, much the same I suppose that Christianity sees everyone as a sinner. The difference is subtle, but Waddism doesn't see everyone as a sinner, because that implies choice. Waddism sees people more as massive screwups. There is no universal redemption in Waddism, because everything is a question of degree. If you are a screwup and don't do anything about it, pretty much you will be dealt with by nature through a brutal selection which will weed you out. However, one of the basic tenets of Waddism is that in life, there are two types of people who rise to the top: cream, and pond scum. Now, of course one hopes that the baddies get their come-uppance in the end, that they will end up in a bunker shooting themselves or being hung upside down in some square with their mistress and their eyes gouged out (see Hitler and Mussolini). However, it appears sometimes that justice, though retributive, is as random as everything else in life. For every lawyer who strikes a blow for justice, truth and redemption, there is some Johhny Cochran type who coins a slogan and gets his scummy client off scot free.
If there is a patron saint for Waddism, it is St. Jude Not Iscariot, as he was subsequently referred to (also known as St. Thaddeus), who eventually was martyred. Imagine having to have your name continuously qualified (like I am Paris, Not Hilton, for instance).
Anyway, St. Jude is the patron saint for lost causes.
Perfect, because one of the central tenets of Waddism is that we are all beset by lost causes. Life is a lost cause.
Franz Kafka, who knew a thing or two about futility, said that life is a series of small scale victories and large scale defeats.
Now, is Waddism negative, if this is the sort of claptrap it espouses?
No, I don't think so. It merely asks the question of yourself and others: How much of a screwup am I or the next person, and what can I do about this?
It is sort of empathy in reverse. You don't seek to understand if and why the other person is acting like a butthead (the guy who pushes past you when you are trying to get off the Tube, the boss who utters plain self-serving nonsense bereft of logic), you just assume it beforehand, and try to deal with it.
Take a look at yourself and try to minimise the Wadhead-ness in yourself, and assume it in others without being negative. Don't let it get you down, but don't pretend that just because you sign off on some it-makes-me-feel-better belief system this will change much about others.
A good friend of mine once said: I am sick of going deep-sea diving for good; if it is not on the surface I am not interested.
Waddism is about realising that the good might lie just below the surface, just as below the surface of what appears to be good may lurk some very nasty stuff indeed.
So don't be disappointed by yourself or others. Espouse forgiveness, but mete it out carefully.
We are all, in one way or another, lost causes.
Sunday, 9 May 2010
ABOUT THE WADHEAD: Waddism
Waddism is the postulate that behind every person there is a lummox, a klutz,a nebbish who does stupid bonehead things, who forgets to tie his shoelace, who slyly hides away from himself vital administrative things which need to be dealt with (taxes, insurance etc.); who fights a constant battle to keep things afloat whilst appearing externally to be in control. Waddism is the open admission that the public , put-together persona is in fact an illusion, carefully crafted perhaps, but an illusion nonetheless, done for the benefit of society and also to keep a job.
Waddism is not the same as angst or insecurity, however. It is not an admission of weakness; it is the embracing of weakness. It is the ability to really appreciate the deep down incompetence of us all, the failures, the petty jealousy, the forgetfulness, the faux-pas, the inappropriate comments, the unplumbed depths of human's capacity to bore, the sheer nearly-but-not-quite nature of the human condition. In sum, the wadhead moves we are all capable of.
The first time I was dubbed (much as a knight is dubbed) a wadhead was by my roommates when I was in grad school. I was in a house in Washington, a house I was admitted into in spite of myself, as they informed me afterwards , after an interview during which I sported a newly grown (giving myself more credit than was due) Fu Manchu moustache, done because the carpenters I was working with at the time both had one. To call it a Fu Manchu was actually above its station. My hair is (was) blondish, and the only part that was really visible were the two reddish side flaps going down either side, sort of like "two caterpillars crawling down either side of your mouth," as my friend Joel, later to become a lawyer put it. He said he had difficulty concentrating on what I was saying, thinking all the while "Why did he do that? He looks like an idiot."
But I got into the house anyway, a confirmation of one of the guiding features of Waddism, namely the ability to be GIVEN THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT. We could not, as humans, survive without this basic ability. On either side. I suppose it is a form of do unto others philosophy, but it is more the appreciation that Yes, that person is as big a screwup as I am, but I am ok with that. I also shaved off the Fu monstrosity the day after the interview. Unprompted, a casual admission that that particular peak was too steep to climb.
Waddism,and wadheads, can be endearing, if sometimes exasperating.
The investiture ceremony, if we can call it that....the moment that the Wadhead was enshrined, came at Joel's birthday, when his girlfriend at the time, Meryl Rose, penned the following limerick:
I can tell that it is no fluke
One thing about Joel makes me puke
It's bad that he studies
But worse that he's buddies
With Eric, the Wadhead from Duke.
And there it was. The birth of the Wadhead.
Waddism, the discovery that this was not, in fact, an isolated particular event, but indeed a universal event applicable to all, came later.
But it was a start.
To be continued.....
Waddism is not the same as angst or insecurity, however. It is not an admission of weakness; it is the embracing of weakness. It is the ability to really appreciate the deep down incompetence of us all, the failures, the petty jealousy, the forgetfulness, the faux-pas, the inappropriate comments, the unplumbed depths of human's capacity to bore, the sheer nearly-but-not-quite nature of the human condition. In sum, the wadhead moves we are all capable of.
The first time I was dubbed (much as a knight is dubbed) a wadhead was by my roommates when I was in grad school. I was in a house in Washington, a house I was admitted into in spite of myself, as they informed me afterwards , after an interview during which I sported a newly grown (giving myself more credit than was due) Fu Manchu moustache, done because the carpenters I was working with at the time both had one. To call it a Fu Manchu was actually above its station. My hair is (was) blondish, and the only part that was really visible were the two reddish side flaps going down either side, sort of like "two caterpillars crawling down either side of your mouth," as my friend Joel, later to become a lawyer put it. He said he had difficulty concentrating on what I was saying, thinking all the while "Why did he do that? He looks like an idiot."
But I got into the house anyway, a confirmation of one of the guiding features of Waddism, namely the ability to be GIVEN THE BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT. We could not, as humans, survive without this basic ability. On either side. I suppose it is a form of do unto others philosophy, but it is more the appreciation that Yes, that person is as big a screwup as I am, but I am ok with that. I also shaved off the Fu monstrosity the day after the interview. Unprompted, a casual admission that that particular peak was too steep to climb.
Waddism,and wadheads, can be endearing, if sometimes exasperating.
The investiture ceremony, if we can call it that....the moment that the Wadhead was enshrined, came at Joel's birthday, when his girlfriend at the time, Meryl Rose, penned the following limerick:
I can tell that it is no fluke
One thing about Joel makes me puke
It's bad that he studies
But worse that he's buddies
With Eric, the Wadhead from Duke.
And there it was. The birth of the Wadhead.
Waddism, the discovery that this was not, in fact, an isolated particular event, but indeed a universal event applicable to all, came later.
But it was a start.
To be continued.....
Saturday, 8 May 2010
Wednesday, 5 May 2010
Monday, 3 May 2010
THE MIGHTY WAD: Money is like sleep...
Much as the wad might be confused with penga (wedge, spondoolies, as in wads of cash) in fact, material goods are of little interest. Nonetheless, many waddisms do involve the filthy lucre.
Such as this one:
Such as this one:
Sunday, 2 May 2010
THE MIGHTY WAD: My money talks
My roommates in grad school christened me Wadhead for some of the bonehead moves I used to do (such as leaving a ham hock lying around the kitchen for six weeks, which eventually ended up greeting me one morning in my shower).
However, even wadheads have their moments. Herewith the first in many installments of The Mighty Wad.
Living well is the best revenge, but having the last word ain't bad.
However, even wadheads have their moments. Herewith the first in many installments of The Mighty Wad.
Living well is the best revenge, but having the last word ain't bad.
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